When people say “pride,” young people often think of someone arrogant who looks down on others. But pride in real life looks different. It hides in everyday situations—and that is exactly where it should be sought in conversation.
Where pride really lives
Here are several situations you can use to start the conversation:
- On social media: you sent a message—and they read it but did not reply. What do you feel? Where might pride be here?
- In conflict: you know that you were wrong too — but you wait for the other person to apologize first. Why is it so hard to take the first step?
- By comparison: you found out that someone you know received what you wanted. What happens inside you?
These situations reveal pride where it truly lives — not in theory, but in the heart.
What Scripture says
"Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall." Proverbs 16:18
Solomon writes this not to frighten, but to warn. Pride destroys relationships and closes the heart to God and to people. Jesus’ parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector shows two extremes: a person with a long list of achievements and a person who came with empty hands. It is the second who goes away justified.
How to build the conversation
- Begin not with a definition of pride, but with a situation — real or familiar.
- Ask: “What do you feel at that moment? Where does that feeling come from?”
- Do not try to “prove” that someone is proud — invite them to self-examination.
- End not with a verdict, but with hope: pride is overcome not by willpower, but by a change of focus — from self to God and to one’s neighbor.
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain glory, but in humility consider one another higher than yourselves." Philippians 2:3
The best discussion on the topic of pride is one after which a person does not feel condemned, but begins to ask: “Where is this in me — and how can I change?” The answer to that question always leads to Christ.
